Ruiqi and Miki summon the legendary Cobaltic Questgiver, a legendary torture device designed to force people to go on epic, highly deadly quests. Yes, we're finally doing this again. A bunch of tendrils extend out of the Cobaltic Questgiver and pull Dave into a portal embedded in its front...

THE QUEST is to stop Jake England the Evil Poacher from taking over the world by stealing the legendary Pokémon Groundoon. Dave starts out in a high-tech room with a lot of machines. One of them is a teleporter which accepts variable-length coordinates in decimal. In order to stop Jake England the Evil Poacher, he must steal and seal away Jake England the Evil Poacher's most powerful weapon, the DAVE KILL LAZER, by teleporting into the vault in which it is contained, taking it with him, and casting it into the fires of hell. The teleporter is configured to work only when transporting to the coordinates of the DAVE KILL LAZER; teleporting to any other coordinates will instead vaporize the user. In addition, the DAVE KILL LAZER's coordinates change over time, as shown by the formulas below.

The vault's coordinates consist of the integer part of \[\left\Vert \begin {pmatrix} \mathfrak{I}\left [\left (\pi\uparrow\uparrow 5\right )e^{\left \lfloor e^t \right \rfloor 2\pi i}\right ] \\ \sum_{n=0}^{\left \lfloor t \right \rfloor} mod\left (3\sqrt{\pi^n+5n+117}, \left \lfloor 2n^2 \right \rfloor\right ) \\ \int _{0} ^{\left \lfloor e^t \right \rfloor} \frac{\left (2\pi\right ) ^{\left \lfloor t \right \rfloor}}{x} \;\text{d} x \end {pmatrix}\right\Vert\] where \(t\) is the number of seconds elapsed since the Unix epoch in Universal Coordinated Time.

This is, of course, impossible to calculate for quite a few reasons:

• Due to the size of \(t\), which is on the order of 10⁹, \(\left \lfloor e^t \right \rfloor\) simply changes too quickly to be feasibly calculated, making the rest of the expression change at that rate as well.
• \(\pi \uparrow \uparrow 5\) is simply too large to feasibly calculate. \(\pi \uparrow \uparrow 4\) is already too large to feasibly calculate (see this Matt Parker video), and \(\pi \uparrow \uparrow 5\) is \(\pi\) raised to the power of that.